being brave

I have multiple posts that I have written and not posted.  It's weird because this used to be such a comfortable place.  Now, I come here and constantly re-think what I should say.  Should I talk about the things I'm enjoying on TV/movies? (I wrote a whole post on that topic)  Should I tell a story like I used to?  (wrote one of those too) Or maybe just write and write and write whatever may come out?  (yup, wrote that as well)

I just don't know how to do this anymore.  And honestly, I don't think anyone reads, which is 100% understandable because I haven't written regularly in years.  But I miss it.  So I don't even care.  I'm going to write when I feel it.  I'm going to ramble and dribble on.  And post a photo or two because I'm still taking them constantly.

Here's to being brave and posting again.

So I don't forget what's going on right now

>>I took a nap today and it was glorious.

>>This past week was one of amazing blessings that occurred only because of the incredible trials that happened simultaneously.  You can't have one without the other, right?  Well, I guess you can, but you certainly won't appreciate them as much or revel in their wonder as much as when you are flat on your face with nothing but Jesus to pick you up.  I'd like to see a blessing brought by good things, but I'm also learning to be content with where God has me.  Including those times when life is hard.  Choosing joy. Learning that my peace comes from Him and not what is swirling around me.

>>My pastor's sermon was about trials this morning.  No joke.  It was about the disciples on the water in the storm and Jesus coming to them.  He basically gave an entire message that was 100% exactly what I needed to hear after a week of trial after trial.  I took lots of notes and just soaked in every verse.  Love it when God shows up like that in life.  He feels so personal and close, doesn't He?

>>I finished my first book of off the summer reading list.  These Broken Stars.  It was good.  I couldn't put it down, so I finished it quickly.  But it wasn't one of those "stay-with-you-for-a-while" stories.  I just wanted to know what happened.
Also, I would like to just like to comment on the trend of naming characters way-out-there names.  I feel like it started with Hunger Games years ago.  Katniss, Peeta, Haymitch, Primrose, Gale (which now seem normal because we all know and love them).  The two main characters in this book were Lilac and Tarver.  Kinda weird.
I'm totally fine with fun new names, but please, can we just back off a bit and stop trying to re-invent the world we create by giving people random names just because?  The 100 was the worst offender.  I literally didn't remember who anyone was because the names were so ridiculous and hard to remember.  Clarke was a girl.  Bellamy was a boy. And Glass...a girl.  It was distracting.

>>Current obsessions: getting everything on my list completed (I'm determined to not be 50% behind when camp starts on Wednesday.  This might be a pipe dream, but by hook or by crook, I'm gonna try.); Catching Fire: movie and soundtrack (still re-watching/listening constantly), Fever by The Black Keys; Ruth and the whole concept of a Redeemer and Christ being my Redeemer; How I Met Your Mother (just started from the beginning for the first time); reading this (I'm into the Great War and poisonous gas and the horrors of Gallipoli.  I keep thinking about that scene in Legends of the Fall when Samuel gets stuck in the barbwire fence when the gas is released and Tristan is screaming his name searching for him) and listening to this (2 months free of Audible courtesy of Amazon Local coupon).

>>Essential Oils.  I use them every day now.  Diffuse them at night (alternate between Thieves so I don't get sick and lavender and peppermint for a peaceful night sleep).  I use them on my face in the morning (frankincense) and evening (blend called Clear Skin).  Still searching for something to help with headaches though.  Nothing I've tried has truly taken them away, only helped slightly.

>>One of those blessings this week was phone calls and texts from dear friends whom I haven't seen in a long time.  It's amazing what a short conversation with someone who loves you and is genuinely concerned for your heart will do for you.  I felt so much better having just had them listen to me and care about what was going on in my life.  And hearing their burdens and taking those on my shoulders as well.  I hate distance and the inevitable lessening of time spent together.  But I'm also thankful for those dear ones that instantly feel like home when I'm with them or talking with them no matter how long it's been in between visits.  I'm incredibly blessed by the friends in my life.

>>It all starts Wednesday.  Summer #16 here.  I'm equally so excited I could jump out of my skin and terrified that that it's actually here.

Summer 2014, let's be friends.  Let's have some adventures.  Let's learn some lessons together and make some fantastic memories.

30 Days: Day 24 - Wall art

I've had my eye on quite a lot of prints on Etsy lately.  Time to refresh some walls and add some new life.  Here are a few favorites that are just waiting to go into the old shopping cart.  

alittlelark

(I've always been a little obsessed with space and the moon and stars)

FancyThatDesignHouse

(one of my favorite pieces of scripture)

Clare Elsaesser

(i love this x900.  so perfect.)

Nan Lawson

(I've been drooling over NL's work for years.  This piece is one of her best.)

VN Printable Art
(I'd love to do an all black and white wall like this one)

Concepcion Studios
(cause he's my favorite character ever, EVER)

30 Days: Day 23: Cold Complaining

(one of my favorite thrift store scores ever.  a Beatles album in playable condition for $1)

(it has nothing to do with this post)

I'm trying really hard not to complain.
I am.
Now...I'm also failing miserably in all this trying.

It's cold here.
Still.
One of the coldest, most snowy winters I have ever experienced here on the East Coast.
It is now being followed by one of the coldest Springs.
It's miserable, you guys.

I will admit that Hawaii was the cruelest of teases.
80 degrees days and 60 degree evenings.
We left a day early for that trip to Hawaii to avoid a massive snowstorm.
Only to come fly home the day of yet another snowstorm.

It feels like Narnia when the White Queen was ruling.
Always winter and never Christmas.

I'm ready for short sleeves and flip-flops.
I'm ready for planting flowers.
I'm ready for the annual cleaning of the porch to enjoy the sunsets (at 8:00!).
I'm ready for not putting on extra layers of clothing because the chill just won't leave the air.

I'm sorry for complaining, but I need winter to disappear!
Come, Alsan and vanquish this wretched winter.
Banish it to the depths of the sea for a few months.

2014, you will be remembered by your horrid, cold entry.
Let's hope you decide to play nice the rest of the year.
I can't take any more of this cold non-sense.

30 Days: Day 22 - The ordinary

(new art for my walls from my sweet sister)

I haven't a proper post because I was scouring the beach for driftwood and cutting paper feathers out of old Anthropologie catalogs.  Oh, and doing a load of wash while watching Mary and Matthew have their proper fairy tale engagement.  Phone calls with parents.  Cooking of dinner.  Talks with old friends.  Plus, working a full 8 hours cleaning the gym, sweeping floors, answering phones, opening and distributing mail and having a long discussion about fashion with a highly intelligent kindergartener.
Life is funny, sometimes, in the things that make it up.  Bits and bobs of randomness that string together to make our days.  Little moments of seeming unimportance.  Usually they fly by at such a rapid pace that we don't have a moment to sit in the wonder of their ordinary existence.  I know I can end days thinking "today was so ordinary and boring".

But is there really such a thing?

30 Days: Day 15 - growing and learning

This time of year, I start to get a little obsessed over plants and flowers.  It's the spring weather and warm sunshine I'm sure. Also, the whole thought process of new life at Easter.  I just love it.

I'm learning each year what works in the tiny Cottage flower bed and what doesn't.  Yes, I've killed lots of plants.   But that's part of the process.  I've learned that our shade to sun ratio has changed in recent years.  I've learned that most of our wild animals (rabbit, deer, squirrels, fox, ducks, geese) will consume just about any type of flower that I want to plant (yes, even marigolds and petunias), so don't get too attached to those colorful blooms.  I've learned that peppermint LOVES our soil and is taking over at a rapid rate.  I've learned that I can grow jalapenos in large pots, but the rabbits (deer? squirrels?) will eat them even though they are spicy/hot.  

I wish so much that I could have a garden to grow my own veggies for the year, but alas, that is a fool's errand between the 4 legged creatures that roam my yard and the 2 legged creatures (200 campers every week) that would trample or eat them.  I'll have to stick to herbs and flowers.  And for now, that quite enough to make me happy.

Weeding has become very therapeutic for me.  Very stress relieving.  So very kind of God to send me lots of weeds to take care of when my life is incredibly stressful.  And what a beautiful picture of how I need to take care of those problems, trials and sins in my own walk with Christ.  We talk a lot, God and me, when I weed.  I day dream.  I listen to podcasts.  I escape.

This year, I'm excited to be able to use my peppermint in better ways now that it is established and ready for harvesting.  I'm excited to try growing some lavender in pots.  I'm excited to fill my porch with a few geraniums and a few other small pots that the animals can't touch.  I'm excited to watch them bloom and grow and follow the sun.

Spring is here!

30 Days: Day 12 - Crowd funding and my money

(screen shot from that time my roomie and I watched the counter turn to $2M in less than 12 hours)

Can we talk crowd funding for a minute?

Has anyone else jumped on the band wagon?

I have backed quite a few projects and most have met their goals.

My #1 favorite was the Veronica Mars Movie Kickstarter.  The moment I heard about it I threw some money into the pot and watched as the magic happened.  The goal was reached in less than 12 hours.  My roommate and I were glued to that Kickstarter counter all day watching it skyrocket and then turn the magic 2 million.
Backers were treated with fun rewards (t-shirts, stickers, shooting script) as well as exclusive content and the inside scoop while the movie was cast, filmed, edited and then distributed and shown to the world.  Lots of cast videos and photos.  We got a download of the movie on the day it was released in theaters.  It was all kinds of fun.

The moment of truth was, of course, the movie itself.  It was fantastic.  Quite sure I'm looking at it with V-Mars loving glasses, but as a fan it did not disappoint.  I've watched it more times than I would like to admit....cough...cough.  And I'm still getting updates and emails even thought the movie has already been finished and released.

I love the part of feeling like I can choose what I want to see.  I got in a discussion with someone about how they didn't think it was fair asking people for money for movies because most of the time they get studio funding.  Or it is wrong for famous actors who have a large bank fund to ask others for money to  get their passion project made . Those crowd funders didn't get a producer credit or any compensation for their investment.

I disagree.  I wanted a Veronica Mars movie for years.  I was presented with a chance to make it happen costing me only a few dollars out of my pocket.  I would have spent money to see it in theaters and buy it, so why not put that money up front and make sure it gets made.  I don't care about getting credit for it.  I cared more about making sure it actually got made.  So, sure, I'll send over $35 to back a project I want to see.  It's my money.  My money talks louder when I back something before it gets made than the $12 I give the theater to sit and watch the finished project.  You better believe that all of Hollywood took notice of the V-Mars project.  I'm sure they were intimidated too.

Remember, your money has a voice that can almost be louder than your actual words.  Where you choose to spend it says quite a bit about you.  This is something I have learned (and am still learning) the only way I can, by giving.  I still have a long way to go.  But I never want to be one of those people who says, "I'll give more when I have more."  Nope.  If I'm not giving now towards the things I am passionate about then I certainly won't later.  Even more than movies or books or passion projects, this rings true for all the orphans I sponsor and the organizations that do good things across the world and my own church.  My money speaks loudly.  Even if it does seem like a measly amount compared to what other give.

30 Days: Day 8 - Chocolate

I don't love shave ice all that much.
However this one came with sweetened condensed milk on the top.
Whaaaat?!
It was delicious.
Bonus: it was eaten whilst on the North Shore.

I'm a chocolate person.
I don't understand desserts that don't have chocolate.
Why do they exist?
They are like a cruel joke.

xoxo,

Chocoholic

30 days: Day 4 - rambling daydreamer

I'm a daydreamer.
A story teller.
A people watcher.

Stories are constantly floating around in my head.
They swirl about when I travel, especially.
Airports...airports are the best for daydreamers.
There are an abundance of blank canvases walking around before me just begging for me to come up with their stories.

When I was in Hawaii, I was constantly thinking about a story I have been in the process of writing (for myself) over the last few years.  The setting is Hawaii.  I was always looking around for all of those places that I had created in my head.  It was the weirdest thing to feel like something you imagined might actually be around the next corner.  Or at least something that could represent what your imagination had created.  A house.  A shop.  A road.  It felt so real there.

Some places seem to lend themselves to daydreams.  Paris was like that for me.  So was the California coast.  And Seattle.  And Annapolis.  And Hawaii, of course.  If only I could spend my days hopping from place to place, writing, writing, writing.  Taking the time to let the stories out that flit through my brain.

A traveling writer.
That sounds pretty perfect, don't you think?

Music note:  Have you heard the song Daydream by Jillian Edwards?  It's been on repeat for me lately.

high seas

I think I need this for my wall.
No, make that, I absolutely need it.
Tall ships = my obsession.

This one is kinda sweet too.

Both prints are from lovelysweetwilliam on Etsy.  

Mixing Bowl

I love the fact that we have a traffic snarl called The Mixing Bowl. Silly, I know. I also love the fact that I didn't get stuck in The Mixing Bowl today.

Side note: I'm headed home tomorrow. To my own bed. My own Cottage. My own roommate. And my computer is just about back to normal. Photoshop here I come.

Still very busy

See...