October 10, 2007

when the barista gives you caffeine instead of de-caf

What to write tonight....what to write....
I've been wanting to write all day but just don't know what to say. Ever feel like that? Like you have a million things rolling around in your head, but you just can't seem to get them down on paper. I feel that way a lot. I've always felt like I should write a book. It's another one of those things on my "to do" list before I die. I have journals upon journals full of stuff. But sometimes it feels like I should be writing something else.
I've always been fascinated by writing and storytelling. I wrote stories all the time growing up. I would write continuations of my favorite TV show characters and the lives I imagined that they lived after the show that I had just watched. I would write about inanimate objects and how they had feelings like humans do. Like trees and beaches and random things like that. I filled up notebooks with stories and "scripts." I dreamed of the day that I would really write for TV, after I had my degree and moved out to Hollywood.
Well, I got that degree, but God had other plans. I never regret where I am in life. I love my job and my friends and where I live so very much. But sometimes, in my daydream world, I wonder what would have happened if I had pursued TV more seriously. Would I be writing and shooting and editing on a network like NBC? Would I be living in LA where the beaches are huge and beautiful and there are palm trees and warm weather? Who would I be? Who would my friends be? Did God protect me from a world that I couldn't have survived in?
TV shows, good TV shows, make me think about that world a lot, that other parallel universe, that other me. When I watch something with really good writing, with amazing characters who are so well written, with truly inspiring scripts, I think about it. Maybe that's why I have always loved TV so much and books and stories. There is something in that world that truly gets me excited like nothing else can.
***And yes, I was just watching Friday Night Lights. Freakin' good TV.
****And yes, the barista got me good tonight. It's late. I should be asleep, but no. So annoying!
*****And one more time. If I wrote TV characters, I hope they would be as fantastic as:
Alright...signing off to watch Dave. I still get giddy thinking about that night we saw him! Sorry for the rambling, but hey, you are the ones who choose to read my ramblings. For goodness sakes, I don't ever have anything important to say anyway!

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