October 14, 2008

leave it at that


I don't have anything tonight.
I've felt like I was on an emotional roller coaster today.
No particular reason.
In fact, today was a pretty normal day.
Mundane in fact.
But sometimes my mind over reacts, and I can't make logical sense of things that are pretty straight forward.
Things like a super high bill for my car getting fixed.
Things like being angry with myself for not running today when my only excuse is "I don't want to."
Things like getting frustrated with God cause I feel like He is far away, but not taking the time to pursue Him like I need to.
Over analyzer = me.
Some days, I just don't want to deal with everything.
Some days, I want to just go to sleep and start all over.
Some days, I want to not be lonely.
Some days, I want to just be me and not feel so guilty about it.

Today was a yucky day, mentally. And to really be honest, to really write what I feel, I just couldn't make something up or cover it over with a post about TV or books. Today, I just wanted to write what I feel and leave it at that....

2 comments:

Anonymous said...

the thing about bad mental days is that the next day is almost always better. even though your brain will tell you that is impossible. i've been there many times myself.

i hope you get some sleep and feel better tomorrow. love ya friend!

Anonymous said...

i thought you seemed sad last evening. i'm praying extra hard for you. - mama